TI feat. Kanye West, Jay-Z, Lil Wayne - Swagger Like Us
You have to have a brain dump every once and awhile... PRO-TIP: If you’ve got to take a dump and you can only hold one, hold the brain dump, take the regular dump. Trust me.
I'm analytical, and a fan of quiet reflection. I want my mind to be clear. I like to get all the thoughts in my head out of my head and put to rest. I feel like when I have a clear head that my decisions are better. I feel like my mind is more clear. I feel well adjusted and emotionally accessible. On the flipside, I feel weird when I think about my thoughts. Inside my head, I have impossible expectations for social interactions… Thanks, porn.
I’ve pretended nothing was wrong when I was upset to avoid having a difficult conversation. It’s one of the worst things I’ve ever done to myself. In retrospect we’d all probably have been better of telling the truth, but hindsight is 20/20 so, whatever. I have been non-communicative about my needs as a person about what I wanted at certain times of my life because I was still green. I couldn’t say what I wanted to say because I was afraid of hurting people’s feelings. I worried too much about how it would make them feel and I was scared they wouldn’t like me anymore. How crazy!
How irrational is wanting to have and all your social interactions go well? Very actually irrational but it sounds very reasonable. I want compromise. I want everything to go smoothly and when there is friction I get upset. I guess I become dishonest to avoid potential friction because I am afraid to communicate. I’ll just go along with things I don’t want to do. I guess I like peace of mind. I’ve purchased extra insurance on rental cars because I’m willing to pay a little extra to not have to worry.
I'd have to say that one of the things that is most crazy for me is that I am always dealing with an anxiety about performing. I am tired of feeling anxious about performing all the time. I have been doing stand-up consistently for the last few years and I have always had issues with anxiety before performing. I think I want to do well and I put too much pressure on myself. I think where I am running into trouble is comparing myself to others it’s a big waste of time.
Luckily, reading and writing is what I do and I’ve been thinking about my mind, body, and soul more lately. I've also been toying with the idea of a sharpening my sword. Like from the book the 7 habits of highly effective people.
I think that sharpening your sword builds swagger. I believe if you spend a lot of time on your preparation then you're going to perform well. I think, “Don't skimp on the presentation”. There are different phases to the game and nothing can be overlooked. You have to focus on the process, product, and presentation.
That’s enough for today.