by Tim Trueheart

D. S. Halacy's Cyborg: Evolution of the Superman in 1965 featured an introduction which spoke of a "new frontier" that was "not merely space, but more profoundly the relationship between 'inner space' to 'outer space' – a bridge...between mind and matter."[3]

    Interesting idea huh? The concept of cyborgs is not a new idea nor is it even that far off in the future. Realistically there are already cyborgs walking among us everyday.

And I’m not talking about that Cyborg.

I’m talking about these cyborgs.

    What actually got me interested in cyborgs was the concept of bio-hacking, or Do-it-yourself biology, and also this online community know as DIYbio, an informal umbrella organization for individuals and local groups active in do-it-yourself biology.

    How long until some guy says, “I don’t want my penis anymore, I want a robot dick,” then he chops off his hog in hopes of getting himself a Vader stick, or a Johhny 5? Excuse me, a Johhny 9½?

Right now being a bio-hacker is hot, and being a cpu hacker is not. Who cares about doing shit online when you can change your very own body? Sure you could change your body by sitting in front of  your LCD screen 24/7 playing Starcraft but you’d develop a gut, a flat ass, and a hump… not to mention permanently orange fingertips (thanks Chester Cheetah).

Bio-hackers and wannabe Cyborgs are the next big thing and if you want to be cool you’ve gotta hop on the bandwagon like Jax, from Mortal Kombat.

   With online forums the bio-hacking community is actually pushing ahead of our medical industry, and finding answers to questions you probably haven’t even thought about.

    Who doesn’t want to solve the weight-loss puzzle solved? Or the zit issue? Let us stop our faces from getting moles, sunspots, and wrinkles why don’t we! We’re not idiots… of course not, that’s why you’re reading this blog because you’re a BAMF (bad-ass-mother-fucker). I usually say futhamucka, but the abbreviation for that would be BAFM, and wouldn’t be as cool.

    We must hack our own bodies, minds, and souls…Wait souls? YES, our souls... Can we even hack our souls? Dunno, but I’m going to try!

    Imagine hacking your soul. I’d turn my give-a-fuck-meter down to zero just to see how gangster it feels. Then I’d flip the script and go straight “Ghandi” on the knuckleheads. I’d get all “Jesus” on the douchebags and start levitating in front of em like, “And what now fool? The messiah floating all up in this bitch! Look at me now, look at me now, I’m your savior!”

    Before we start soul hacking we must first hack our bodies, and minds. Now, I don’t know exactly how that works. It’s definitely a ‘Chicken or the Egg’ situation. What do you hack first, your body, or your brain? I imagine I’d want to hack my brain first to make sure my mind worked right ensuring I could follow through on my body hacks. Hmm, this question may send me back to the drawing board. The hardest thing about going back to the drawing board is realizing how much your drawing suck.





D. S. Halacy, Cyborg: Evolution of the Superman (New York: Harper and Row Publishers, 1965), 7.